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Common Mistake Singles Make In a Relationship

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#1: Falling Too Fast

You’re just one week in a relationship and you start telling yourself, he/she is “the one.” These days, many people are hardly in any hurry to commit seriously. Never yield your heart hurriedly to anyone. The feeling might be quite strong. There might be a perceived connection, but your new partner may just see you as a short-term fling. Be sensible enough not to give in so easily.

Avoid falling too fast until you’re sure your partner views the relationship with the same level of seriousness as you.

#2: Revealing Emotions Too Soon

Even when you notice you are falling for this fellow be wise to hold back your words. Don't be in a hurry to show or proclaim it. Expressions like, “I think I’m falling in love with you,” should be guided against. Think it, don’t say it. The early stages of a relationship usually seem so promising and even if you feel deeply comfortable, your emotions may be more advanced than theirs. Hold it a little longer and watch your partner

#3: Blowing Them Up Constantly

It’s 2020, and texting all day long is the new normal. And when you like someone, of course, you want to talk and hear from them all the time. But compulsive texting can be a huge turnoff early in dating. It shows neediness and a lack of self-control. Try to match your partner’s texting frequency (unless they’re the ones overdoing it). Act busy and reduce excessive communication especially at the early stage of the relationship.

#4: Getting Physical Too Quickly

By all means have sex only after marriage. Know that when sex enters a relationship before marriage, it can hijack your emotions and cloud your judgment. Sex in a non-marital relationship can complicate the relationship too soon. Sex is divinely reserved for marriage.

#5: Getting Nosy

Trying to pry into a partners privacy at every opportunity early in a relationship can be damaging.

A young lady I know visit a guy whom just started dating her. While in the sitting room, the young pleaded with her to go get his drugs in his room. He was sick. Rather than get the drugs straight away, she went to the room and started searching his things. The young waited for the duration he thought she be back and not seeing her headed for his room. He saw her searching his things and there and then he ended the relationship.

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#6. Respect Personal Space

Some people become excessively at the beginning of a relationship, which often backfires and makes the other person eventually withdraw. People need space. You definitely have to give your partner their private time without you.

#7: Ignoring Red Flags

It’s tempting to overlook less-than-ideal personality traits in the beginning of a relationship, either because you’re smitten, or because you really want things to work out (or both). But don’t overlook lying, name-calling, aggression, verbalized jealousy, or an overindulgence in substances—as these can all be warning signs of a future toxic relationship.

#8: Trying to Predict Their Feelings

Countless conversations and texts with your friends trying to analyze and predict how into you they are can lead you down the wrong path. Instead, focus on what you’re thinking and feeling. So many of us waste the early days of a new relationship focusing singularly on the other person. Think of it like a job interview: You’re not just trying to sell yourself to the company – you’re also trying to find out if it’s the right place for you, too.

Don't double-think (trying to assume or predict what his/her action or reaction would be). Let him/her speak out before you judge him.

#9: Badmouthing Your Exes

It doesn’t matter how much you hated your ex—nobody wants to hear you go on and on about the last person you were with. And, if you vent about how bad and crazy they were, your new flame may start to wonder what’s wrong with you for dating someone like that. Avoid!!!

Your Ex(es) is/are what they are. You don't need to speak bad of them to seek for favour or affection from your new found love.

#10: Tolerating Bad Behaviour

From showing up late, to being glued to a phone, if you don’t speak up early, bad behaviours will continue. You don’t have to be overly demanding; just set out simple boundaries and expectations, like, “Being late doesn’t work for me,” or, “I prefer our dates to be just you and me.”

Philomina

Social writer and digital marketing personnel.

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