A TEACHER of Kafue over the weekend pitted himself against a banker in a vicious exchange of fists and knuckles over a thigh vendor they both wanted.
After having one too many at a local joint known as The Top Pub, the teacher decided to end the evening by enjoying the flesh of a local thigh vendor but all hell broke loose when his departure was stopped by the banker who was also eyeing the same woman.
According to Kafue Times, the men who are both said to be married decided to settle the dispute via a boxing bout that brought all dancing, drinking and chit chats about underperforming Chelsea to an abrupt end.
In the moment, the teacher who should have been drawing up lesson plans for school learners was throwing punches at the banker who also should have been in a bank monitoring the now volatile Zambia exchange rate.
As the two drunk professionals threw jabs, hooks and uppercuts at each other, fellow patrons could not believe seeing how sweat was flowing, like the Kafue river, on the bodies of the two adults, who are even holders of Grade 12 certificates.
As the Vladimir Putin versus Volodymir Zelensky Kafue edition war was on, the thigh vendor was on standby, waiting to go and subject the winner of the contest to some Nakambala sugar punishment.
Maybe out of care or just for disturbing their fish-like drinking, patrons stood and started playing the United Nations (UN) peace-keeping role in the lightweight contest.
Their mitigation paid off as the fight was stopped. But there was no one to officially announce the winner of the bout.
However, everyone with common sense quickly realised that the teacher was the champion, since he is the one who was seen whisking away the prize, the lady, in his Toyota Allion.
Since the poor teacher had already lost quite a good number of joules of energy and maybe a full bottle of Vatra, via sweating, it is unlikely that he went on to win the bed fight “with our sister.”
Indeed, like Mae West says, tlof tlof is emotion in motion, and this is what happened in Kafue; there were high emotions and in the end, punches of a teacher and a banker were set into motion.
Meanwhile, some people talked to expressed sadness that married men could be fighting over a thigh vendor .
But another one said that everything on earth is fought for, including thigh vendors .
