Zimbabwean Perspective on the Divorce Effects on Children

Zimbabwean Perspective on the Divorce Effects on Children

Divorce is a painful and traumatic experience that disrupts the lives of people.

The Main Causes Of Divorce in Zimbabwe

Research has shown that the phenomenon of divorce among black Africans is escalating on a yearly basis.

This is accompanied by emotional, spiritual, and psychological effects which impact on the well-being of people.

In African societies, children are considered as a blessing and a gift from God. Therefore, when parents divorce, it is not only the couple that is affected but also the children.

Children often believe they have caused the conflict between their parents. Many children assume the responsibility for bringing their parents back together, causing them additional stress. Vulnerability to both physical and mental illnesses can originate in the traumatic loss of one or both parents through divorce.

It is important for parents to understand that their children are going through a difficult time and they need support from both parents. Ongoing conflict between parents after they split up is deeply unsettling for children.

Except under extreme circumstances, children are much better off keeping regular, ongoing contact with both parents.

Zimbabwean Perspective on the Divorce Effects on Children

Some common reactions children have to divorce

Children whose parents go through a divorce will naturally all react in slightly different ways depending on the circumstances.

Here are some common reactions that parents should expect:

1. Anxiety: Divorce often causes children to feel tense, nervous, and anxious.
2. Anger: Children may blame you, your spouse, or both of you for “breaking up our family.”
3. Sadness and grief: Children will cry and often act sad as their parents go through a divorce.
4. Confusion, guilt, and self-blame: Young children may be especially confused as they cannot understand the reasons for the divorce or what it means for them. They may feel torn between their parents.
5. A desire for reconciliation: Many children wish and pray for their parents to reconcile, even when it is unrealistic.
6. Withdrawal and isolation: Children may cope with the divorce by withdrawing as a way to avoid the pain of the situation

Some ways to help children cope with divorce

Zimbabwean Perspective on the Divorce Effects on Children

Divorce can be a difficult time for children. Here are some ways to help children cope with divorce:

1. Remind them that they’re loved by both parents.
2. Be honest when talking about it but keep in mind the child’s age and understanding.
3. Avoid blame and don’t share any negative feelings the adults have about each other.
4. Keep up routines such as going to school and specific meal times.
5. Let them know they can talk about their feelings with you – explain that it’s okay to be sad, confused or angry.
6. Listen more than you speak – answering questions will help them to open up.

It is important for parents to understand that their children are going through a difficult time and they need support from both parents.

Keeping a strong, positive relationship with both parents helps children cope with a divorce. Do not argue in front of your children.

Try to avoid custody or visitation disputes. Make sure your children understand they did not cause the divorce, and the divorce is final. Some children hold onto the hope they can get their parents back together.