Performance Punishment: Why You Aren't Getting Promoted
Agreeable people more likely to be exploited and fall behind at work
Performance Punishment: Why You Aren't Getting Promoted
Being a “pleasure to work with” could be why you’re not getting ahead at work ― even if you’re good at your job ― according to one viral TikTok.
In the video, a TikToker named Jacqueline claims that people who are “a pleasure to work with” will “never get promoted” because executives “will never allow an employee who is both good at doing the work and good at keeping a smile on their face while doing the work move up the ladder, because they know they can keep serving you sh*t on a platter, and you’ll eat it with a smile.”
Her theory about the “curse” of being too pleasant has sparked a nerve. The video has been viewed more than 8 million times. But is it backed up by research? Are agreeable people more likely to be exploited and fall behind at work? It depends, experts say.
In response to the TikTok, commenters to her video said that what Jacqueline was describing actually has a name: “performance punishment.” Similar to a “quiet promotion,” it’s where you get more work dumped on you for being a high-achiever, but you do not get the rewards of a raise or a promotion.
In this case, hardworking agreeable colleagues take on work that consistently goes above and beyond their job title.
Performance Punishment: Why You Aren't Getting Promoted
Cynthia Pong, founder of Embrace Change, a career coaching and training firm, said a performance punishment mindset in organizations “does exist and can even run rampant.”
“There absolutely is a perverse incentive there for leaders who would prefer that person to stay in the role where the high achiever is extremely competent, reliable and pleasant,” she said, noting that it can be due to the manager worrying if the workload is going to be done or done “with a smile” if other people do it instead.
@jacquelameo but if I take a week off everything falls apart? it ain’t adding up
Lois P. Frankel, executive coach and author of “Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office: Unconscious Mistakes Women Make That Sabotage Their Careers,” said there is a “kernel of truth” to the TikToker’s theory because being nice is “simply not sufficient for upward mobility.
“Being nice and good at your job are … just table stakes. You’ll most likely get to stay in the game, but you won’t win it,” Frankel said.
There’s a key tipping point when your agreeable nature is leading you to become a pushover at work.
Pong said if the following is true, you might be one pushover:
- Your needs always come last.
- You avoid conflict at all costs.
- You feel resentful about your workload.
- The gulf between what you say and how you really feel inside is significant, or widening.
- Even the thought of saying ‘no’ to a request at work gives you anxiety.
