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Diary of a Single Mother : Motherhood 12

Philomina by Philomina
11/11/2019
in diaries of a single black mother
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The workshop did come to an end and I went back home. I was so happy to hear the sound of tiny feet running up to me and the joyous glees. Tawana was ecstatic to see me I threw him in the air and swung around.

It was good to be back and he was just what I needed to keep my feet on the ground and keep myself in check. For him, I had to be a better person and for that, I needed to be strong… Lest I forget. There was just another person dependent on me now, yes, my son.

After the weekend it was back to work as usual. I called Will and made a date. It seemed as if he was oblivious of the phone call because of how excited he seemed. We went to Orange Groove for drinks after work.

‘Tess,’ he smiled hugging me.
‘Will’
‘ you have been evasive these past weeks, what’s been happening?’
‘I guess I should be asking you that, what’s happening?’
‘me? What? Babie come on, what’s up to your sleeve?’

I gave one throaty laugh, what was this guy taking me for? He was so good, I see now, a cunning fox.

‘I have nothing, but you seem to have lost the game dearly.’
‘Please, let’s not talk in riddles. What’s up?’
‘Why didn’t you tell me you were married? You honestly thought I wouldn’t find out? Seriously, this being a small town?’

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I saw him sit back in his chair, he was taken aback.
‘Tess, I wanted to tell you, I was going to tell you. It’s not what you think.’ I hushed him
‘Not what I think, huh, do you even know what I’m thinking? Do you even know what you have done to me? Taken me for a ride and made a fool out of me!’

‘Babe, please let me explain?’
‘Explain what really?! You should have explained long back, way back. Now is just not the time for that. Your wife called me, and I don’t want that, I don’t need that. I have enough to deal with than to drag myself into a pit.’

‘We are having marital problems and I want out.’
‘I don’t want to know. There is no need for me to know. We are through. Go back to your family Will.’

‘Tess, please, I love you.’

‘If you loved me you would have been open to me from the onset. Now we are done. We can’t be together this way; it’s not what I want. Not even in a thousand years.’

I walked away from him; I had to before he filled my head with his crap. Walking away felt good, I felt so in control. I knew my decision had been the right one.

I remembered some quote by Bob Marley ‘the truth is everyone is going to hurt you. But you have to find the ones worth suffering for.’ Will was not worth that, therefore it was good to let go.

I wish I could say my experiences with the men ( James, Will) in my life gave me a change of heart. It actually didn’t work that way. I still believed that a person had to kiss a few frogs first before meeting the prince.

So I believed in love and still knew that there had to be my soul mate somewhere out there and our paths were going to cross someday. No one needs to be alone…

Click the links below to read the chapters written so far

 

Introducing the Diary of a Single Black Mother

 

Chapter 1: The Diary of a Single Black Mother

Chapter 2: The Diary of a Single Black Mother

Chapter 3: The Diary of a Single Black Mother

Chapter 4: The Diary of a Single Black Mother

Chapter 5: The Diary of a Single Black Mother

Chapter 6: The Diary of a Single Black Mother

Chapter 7: The Diary of a Single Black Mother

Chapter 8: The Diary of a Single Black Mother

Chapter 9: The Diary of a Single Black Mother

Chapter 10: The Diary of a Single Black Mother

Chapter 11: The Diary of a Single Black Mother

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Philomina

Philomina

Social writer and digital marketing personnel.

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